10 least favorite pokemon

So this week makes the 20th anniversary of Pokemon, the rerelease of the Generation 1 games for 3DS systems and the official announcement of Generation 7. So it seemed like a good time to do some more pokemon blogs. And when I looked back at what I'd already done, I realized that despite doing my top 15 favorite a while back....I never did my least favorite. So this seems like the best tiem to correct that.

10) Combee

This thing is god damn useless. Note specifically that that is a picture of a male Combee, as the Female does eventually evolve into the pretty decent Vespiquen. But the thing is,the species is 88% male. Also in its debut Generation (IV), it could only be caught by using honey......a process that involved several hours per attempt (and remember the uber common males are fucking useless. Sure it finally became easier to find in the second set of Gen V, but still

Oh and to top it all off, the damn thing learns 3 moves (4 in gens V and VI) and cant learn TMs so its moveset is crap. And the males go down as one of the most worthless pokemon designed. 

9) Lickilicky

Back in the day, Lickitung was one of my favorite pokemon, I was legit POed that it was basically impossible to get except by trading in Gen 1 (where it came with a dumbass nickname). So I was thrilled when it finally got an evolution in Gen 4......at least until I saw what it evolved into.

Lickitung is this cute pink lizard or turtle thing with a frogs tongue. This thing however is the exact opposite. Its fat, looks like it ate a balloon, appears to be wearing a bib, a weird spiral thingy coming out of its head, drools on everything and  has a full wifi signal.

Basically this thing is the reason Lickitung isnt a favorite pokemon anymore.....its just that bad. 

8) Lopunny

Lopunny, the high class escort pokemon. This pokemon is highly sought after by sick freaks who feel the need to sexualize EVERYTHING.

Seriously there is no real excuse for this. And come on did they really have to make the sprites elbows look like tits? There really isnt much else to say about this one 

7) Aromatisse

Aromatisse: the Crack Whore Pokemon.
Cause yea, thats really all I see when I look at this thing. It looks over makeuped to death like its compensating  and the "thigh slit" doesnt help matters,....guys come on, no more prostitute pokemon.

Also allegedly this thing was based on the medieval plague doctors...but I just cant see it. Also its preevolution  looks like a tiny pink hummingbird, which is actually a pretty cool concept.....I'm just not sure what the fuck happened when this thing evolved...I'm blaming a technical malfunction in the link cables. 

6) Druddigon

This thing landed on this list for two reasons. One its head. What the fuck is up with that? it looks like a cool design from the neck down, but the large red head on a otherwise basically blue body (with red highlights) is kinda jarring. Second it doesnt evolve, the only non legendary dragon that doesnt. Which would be fine if it had decent stats....but it doesnt, its got the worst stat total of any fully evolved dragon type (although admittedly that still gives it good stats compared to every other type).  Which would be fine if say you could catch it early in the game....but you cant. You got to get to the 7th gym to even find this thing. Its a waste of time, and it looks horrible....and its shiny form is even worse. 

Ironically, the orange might work better on its base form....and this would look better with red.

5) Sawk and Throh

You know what really kinda pisses me off? Pokemon in clothes. I mean how does that work? do they need to steal the clothes? can they buy them from humans? are pokemon smart enough to make their own? in any of these cases wouldnt that make them basically sentient and not the animals the game treats them as?

And by the way, thats not these two's only sin......they are also cheap knock-offs (like most of their gen 5 kin). Gen 5 may have been a "reboot" but come on, there guys are basically their generations version of Hitmonchan and Hitmonlee...paired all male non evolving (as the hitmon where in gen 1) fighting types, whose species also happens to be a method of fighting?  

3) Jynx

So you remember how I just mentioned pokemon with clothes piss me off? Well add unnecessary boobs and hair and you have Jynx. And while I actually dont think Jynx was ever intended as a racial stereotype. the "shapeless black blob" for a face thing doesnt really win it any points either (same as with tangela and cloyster who seem to have the same face). Also, this things species name is "the human shape" pokemon. What the fuck is up with that? I dont really mind some of the humanoid pokemon, but to basically flat out state this thing was modeled on a human is both creepy and lazy.

Also by the way, per the in game pokedex entries, this thing actually SPEAKS. Not like its name like in the anime, it speaks a real language.....just not one that humans can understand yet. Again, creepy and against the idea that Pokemon are their universes animals and not sentient creature being kept as unwilling human slaves.

2) Unown

There are 28. TWENTY EIGHT different variants of this pokemon................and they all fucking suck.

It learns a grand total of 1 move.....Hidden Power. And Hidden Power kinda sucks. It only does 60 damage and its type is dependent on one of the many complex math equations hidden in pokemon.....which does mean getting a specific form of Unown with a specific attack type is a challege. Not that youd ever want to try it, as Unowns stat total is a mere 338, it never evolves....and oh yea hidden power is one of only 2 moves that can be learned by EVERY OTHER POKEMON in the game. So there at literally hundreds of better choices if you really really want to use Hidden Power.


4) Hitmonchan

Hitmonchan ranks higher than its later rip offs (Sawk and Throh) because its been around a bit longer, but is basically here for the same reason. Its a pokemon wearing clothes. Although Im not even sure what its wearing....im unfamiliar with any form of boxing that requires wearing a dress. Its an especially odd choice given that Game Freak decided to make Hitmonchan an all male species. Also, those shoes or whatever they are on its feet, look horrible. Those look like a senior citizens walking shoes, not anything athletic.

Also it doesnt help that Hitmonchan seems to have been intentionally designed to suck. Ok so back in Gen 1 you could choose either Hitmonchan or Hitmonlee, and each has a gimmick, Lee is the kicking pokemon, this one punched. Which meant it learned all the elemental punches, and was the only pokemon in the game that could.

Problem was, up until gen 4, the elemental punches were governed by the special stat (or special attack stat in Gen 2 and 3).....and this things special stat was 35.....the same as a freaking pidgy's  (compare that to Lee's kicks, all of which were fighting and normal type, and therefore allowed him to use his 120 attack stat). And if you chose NOT to use Chan's elemental punches, your entire offensive movepool in gen 1 was reduced to normal type moves, except for submissive, which hurt you....but at least you could use your 105 attack stat.

And honestly Generation 2 didnt make this thing much better...it gained 2 dark moves, (base level 40 damage), 1 ground type (base level 20 damage) and two fighting type punches, one of which had 50% accuracy (but 100 damage) and the other 40 damage.......so even with a decent attack stat, this thing still couldnt hit for shit. . Finally in Gen 3 it became at least usable, with access to hardhitting and accurate moves like Sky Uppercut, Brick Break and Earthquake. And of course, in Generation 4 with the changes in the physical special split, it finally became able to make decent use of its original gimmick of having all the elemental punches.....just 9 years too late. 

1) Blaziken

So its funny, I've never actually played Generation 3 on a console I always had to use emulators.

And the reason for that was I decided to skip out on Gen 3.....after they released the final forms of the started as publicity. Now to be honest, I like Swampert and Secptile.....it was really this one pokemon that I objected to. Thats right, I objected to this thing SO BADLY I skipped an entire generation (actually I technically skipped 2, since I didnt play the original gen 4 games on console either, just the remakes)

See I took one look at this thing and said....thats NOT a pokemon, thats a fucking digimon. See at the time I actually thought the digimon cartoon was a spin off of Pokemon. And the fact that a pokemon now looked like it belonged with a cheap knockoff version....well I was quite happy to keep playing my Gold/Silver/Crystal (yes I had all 3) thank you very much (even though I also did have a game boy advance) 

Now fast forward to the present day, I've played Ruby/Sapphire/Emerald via emulators a few times. And I even own Omega Ruby and am playing though that. And I actually really like a bunch of the Gen 3 pokemon, (Grumpig, Aggron, Surskit, Breloom and Volbeat come to mind). But in all those play thoughts I have NEVER played with Blaziken to this day. I tried once, I picked Torchic as my starter, and actually enjoyed him and Combusken.....but as soon as Combusken evolved, I had to reset the game, i just couldnt do it.

And please dont even get me started on this things mega form....its by far the laziest one of them all....they changed its "pants" and added a few flames....and thats it.


So yea, there you have it, 10 pokemon I really cant stand......9 of which I assume many people will agree with me on. Now I just have to win everyone over on Blaziken.....